Inspire 4 Life Fitness Testimony

When I stepped into the Inspire 4 Life studio back in January 2012 to take my very first Zumba class, I was so unsure of how the class was going to go. I was intimidated, I was nervous, I was scared. Laurie Carroll was the instructor and she made me feel welcome and comfortable. That is hard to do for an overweight person stepping into a “gym” for the first time in a long time. But I honestly wasn't scared or nervous to go to another class after that. I was family.

Laurie, Bobby, and Carlos have inspired me, and many others, to either start a journey towards health and fitness or encouraged us in the journey we are currently on. I was honored and privileged to be chosen as the first transformation winner this past summer. I went through 6 weeks of hard-core workouts and nutritional counseling with Bobby, Carlos, and Laurie. Each of them told me they were going to step it up for me. They felt a desire and obligation to do that for me. Yes, that meant harder workouts, but it also meant that really care about my end result. It means that they are concerned about where I go from here. During those 6 weeks of the transformation, I lost a total of 13.25 inches and 39lbs! I have developed more of a drive for exercise, fitness, and healthy living through working out at Inspire 4 Life.

I am no athlete by any stretch of the imagination, but I am eating healthier and exercising more thanks to Inspire 4 Life Fitness. The instructors and trainers are so excited about fitness. They keep me accountable. They are very supportive and encouraging. They love sharing their passion and helping people reach their fitness goals. My thoughts and feelings about "working out" and "fitness" have completely changed since I started taking classes at the studio. It is amazing. When I started, there were so many things that I COULD NOT do. I couldn't even make it through an entire song at Zumba class without being winded and having to stop. Now, I can make it through the whole class, minus real water breaks! I couldn't walk a mile without stopping. Now, I have done 3 5k races and have plans to do more. The first one, I did stop a couple of times; the second one I didn't stop at all; and the third I actually ran some! I couldn't do pushups, let alone even think about doing planks, burpees, suicide drills, mountain climbers, etc. But now, I can do it all! I still have to modify, but I can do it -- all since starting at Inspire 4 Life Fitness.



Laurie Carroll


 

Laurie is so positive and enthusiastic. She has a true passion for fitness and it shows in each of her classes and personal training sessions. Every time I walk into her classes, she pushes me to do things I didn’t think I could do. I have been able to increase my weight-lifting abilities through her classes. She introduced me to Paleolithic eating which has furthered my weight-loss. Laurie has been there to answer so many of my questions and keep me focused on my journey. She accepted me in her Zumba class and has never judged me. She keeps me excited to exercise. Laurie’s dedication and commitment to health and fitness is contagious.





Bobby Campbell

 

I started working with Bobby during the transformation experience. He has a real heart for helping people lose weight and get into a fitness routine. He helped me get back into lifting weights. Every single workout I have had with Bobby has pushed me beyond my limits. Bobby takes time to make sure I am hitting my goals and keeping with my journey, even outside his classes. We did a 5k together in September and after he finished and recovered, he came back to make sure I finished ahead of a goal I had set for myself. When he could see “pain” in my face, he encouraged me to go a little bit longer. He instilled in me that “Pain is weakness leaving the body.” I will never forget that.



 



Carlos Johnson

 

Carlos has been a great coach and supporter for me. He helps with the nutritional Inspired! meeting at the studio and has been pivotal in my food journey. He keeps it real and gives me tips and tricks on changing habits and thinking. His passion is to help people get fit and stay fit. Carlos goes above and beyond to motivate and encourage me to work harder. He has helped me realize that I'll never know what I'm capable of until I push beyond my limits. His workouts are intense and I never thought I would run like he has made me do. But anytime I can’t do an exercise or move, he helps me adapt it to what I can do. There are no excuses with him.


I have been blessed with these fantastic instructors/trainers that have helped me along my way. Each of them has so much knowledge and eagerness to share and I am honored that they share it with me. Every time I start to get discouraged, one of them is there to pick me up and push me a little farther. They have most certainly been advisors and coaches, but more importantly they have become friends and confidants.

Reflections

The past couple of weeks have really been a roller coaster for me. I have not been as dedicated to my eating as I should be. It hit me after I stepped on the scale 2 weeks ago. I didn't hit the goal I had set for myself for the past month. Automatically I start thinking about and reflecting on why I failed....

I had been eating too much junk and carb-loaded foods. Some of it was little things, but little things add up! No one really knew what was going on; I really didn't even realize what I was doing. It was almost like I was subconsciously sabotaging my weight-loss. But I finally woke up and realized what was happening. I knew I was on a slippery slope and I had to make the CONSCIOUS decision to stop. I literally had a confessional with my BFF/accountability partner Jessica on Wednesday of last week, and then with my trainers on Thursday. It was tough, but I knew it had to be done. The more people that knew meant more people that could keep me accountable during this phase of my journey.

After my confessionals, I decided to make weekly goals for myself with my food. Last week I made a goal of making sure at least 1/2 of my weekly meals (11 meals) followed the Paleolithic lifestyle. I made it -- I had 12 Paleo meals last week! This week, I have the same goal. It's going to be a little tougher with Thanksgiving, but I'm determined to make it! I HAVE to make it!

This little bump in the road really made me think about where I came from and the progress I have made. Before, my life was all about the junk and carb-loaded foods! I didn't care at all what I ate. I loved my bread, sweets, chocolate, cake, fried foods.....I loved it all. I still enjoy chocolate, but a more natural version and not every day! I still enjoy muffins, breads, cakes, etc - but grain and gluten free! I still enjoy foods that I love, but in a healthier way.

I know my blogs here lately have been about my journey thus far. This Thanksgiving season has really brought be to a point of reflection. I am so very thankful for the opportunity God has given me to turn my life around. It's hard to look back at just over a year ago and see the road I was headed down. I look a pictures and can't believe the difference. I can't believe how a year changes things! I can see the difference in my pictures, but sometimes I don't feel it. I mean, I feel the healthy difference, but can't always feel the "weight" difference. I hope that makes sense.

I hit a snag in the road and begin to doubt things. It's not pretty! But then I get reassurance from people around me that I am doing such a good job, that they are proud of me, that I'm an inspiration to them. It renews my confidence and determination for this journey I am on. Then I try on an XXL t-shirt that I was for sure wouldn't fit, but IT DID!


my XXL shirt!! :)



I begin to look at pictures from when I first started and realize that I am making progress. No matter how I "feel," my body is changing -- for the BETTER! I remember why I am on this journey. I can't go back down that road. I can't go back to where I was. I will die if I do. There will be ups and downs, but it is so worth it! I will one day be the person I know I'm meant to be. In the meantime, I will enjoy this journey and keep pushing forward.

What a difference!!
January 5k (time 71:40) vs November 5k (time 59:30)

OH! I just realized I haven't even told you about the Color Run 5k I did this weekend! OH EM GEE!!!! It was SO MUCH FUN! Jenny couldn't make it, so Erica's mom came and enjoyed the weekend with us. We got up to Charlotte Friday evening to get our race packets. Saturday morning we woke up early, enjoyed a Paleo breakfast (courtesy of my trainer, Laurie!) and headed to Lowe's Motor Speedway for the race. There were so many people - I think they said over 12,000 -- and we all looked the same in our white! I had a goal to finish in under an hour. My 5k time from September was 69:40, so I knew it was going to be a tough challenge trying to cut 10 minutes off. After the first hill, I was doubtful that I would make my goal. Then the second hill hit, and I just knew I wouldn't make it! Well, I finished in 59:30!!! I made it!!!!! I was so stinkin' excited! I honestly didn't think I would after those hills, which I really didn't expect. This was a huge feat for me and I can't wait for my next race!

Collage

Color FUN!

me and my SIL, Amanda - before and after!

Color Throw Celebration

yes, I AM!!

VICTORY!!

Schedules, Goals, and Diet

I must say I've had a pretty good week overall. Sunday I had a very long and productive phone conversation with my BFF and accountability partner, Jessica. She and I are both at the point where we needed to sit down and set some actual goals for ourselves. We haven't done this in a while, so it was well overdue! I have missed our Sunday evening chats about the week and out goals for the week to come. We talked about alot and set some of our goals in motion. Right now we're concentrating on short-term goals (things to accomplish before Christmas).

My first goal is for my 5k in November. I want to be around the 60 minute mark at the finish line. I finished my last 5k in 69:40. It's going to take some work, but I know I can do it. I have been using my Core 24 membership to work on that. I've gone a couple of times this week and just done a treadmill workout. For a 15 minute mile, I have to average a 4.0 mph pace. The past 2 times I went to the gym, I hit 3.0 and 3.5 mph. I didn't stay there long, but it let me know what that pace felt like. I think I am going to have to start running intervals again. I have't done that in a while, but I know it will get me to where I need to be. I just don't think I can power walk 4.0 mph the whole time, but I know I can do some intervals. So that's next on my list at the gym.

Some other goals involve a weight that I want to be at before October 16th. I'm still not ready to share those numbers here yet, but I'll let you know when I accomplish that goal! :) I have another goal to workout 6 times per week. This week I only hit 5 days, but one of those days I did 2 workouts. So I technically hit my 6 times. I am working on getting a schedule down for my workouts....figuring out days I'll be at the Inspire 4 Life vs Core 24. I'm also working on getting my eating habits in check. I am starting to incorporate more whole grains back into my diet. It's been a struggle making sure I'm not getting too many and keeping my meals planned out. I never thought I would say this, but I want to try to stick to the main points of the Paleo lifestyle. It was actually so much easier than trying to figure out if I'm eating too much of something.

I continue to be amazed at what my body is capable of and the things it's letting me do. I never in a million years imagined that I would have a goal to work out 6 times a week -- let alone actually DOING IT! ...and it  feels GREAT! I am so blessed to have been given a second lease on life and to be able to change my health outcome. It was very scary for the doctor to blatantly tell me that I would die if something didn't change. But it was at that point that I knew I had to do it. I couldn't let heart problems take me away from life. I couldn't let obesity rule my life and rob me of my happiness. I was not going to let more opportunities be taken away from me because of my health. This is MY life and I'm taking it back!

One Year

Today marks one year that I have been on my weight-loss journey. It has been one heck of a year. If you don't know my back story, you can read it here. It's just hard to believe that it has actually been a whole year, 12 months, since I started changing my life for the better. It has taken a true mental dedication to stick to this. I know in my head and my heart that if I hadn't started this journey, I might not be alive. That's just the honest truth. My doctor blatantly told me that if things didn't change, I would die early. I didn't want to die, so I changed! My eating habits are completely different than they were 12 months ago. My activity level is MUCH higher than it was last year. I have new friends and stronger friendships. I am blessed to have had the opportunities for healthy living that I have experienced over the past year. I have now have two 5ks under my belt....something I NEVER would have done or imagined I would do this time last year. AND I have a third 5k scheduled for November in Charlotte with a new friend and 2 friends from college. My life is so much better.

I want to thank a few people specifically. First of all - Jessica. I thank God that we met in Spanish class 10 years ago! God knew I would need you in my life for this very reason. You have always been honest with me, even when it hurts -- and I know it has sometimes. You have kept me grounded and focused on my goals. Thank you for always standing by me and continuing to be a TRUE friend.  Leah - thank you for being my walking buddy. You have helped keep me on track as well. Had it not been for you, I would have never hit the pavement. You have pushed me to do extra things that I never thought I would do (Zumba, the 5k). Thank you for your friendship. Laurie - thank you for accepting me in your Zumba class. You have never judged me and I can't even begin to tell you how much that means. You have been so supportive and encouraging. You keep me excited to exercise. Your dedication and commitment to health and fitness is contagious. I only hope I can pass the excitement along! To Bobby and Carlos - thank you for working with me during this transformation over the past 6 weeks. Both of you have really pushed me beyond my limits. I never thought I would run or lift weights like you have made me do. You have a dedication to fitness as well. Thank you for making me realize that I'll never know what I'm capable of until I push beyond the pain.


I have so many other people to thank for all of their encouragement and support. There are so many that have made such an impact on my journey. I would never be able to thank or recognize them all. If you read this blog, THANK YOU! Knowing that my story is reaching others is so encouraging. My whole reason for blogging has become so that people who may be feeling the same way I do or facing the same struggles I am know that they are not alone. It helps so much to know that! Life is about sharing experiences with others and I am thankful I can share mine with each of you.

Catching You Back Up

As you might have noticed, I didn’t get much of a chance to blog last week. So let me try to catch you up! I left you having made my 8,000 step goal for Tuesday; well I met that goal again Wednesday! I hit 8, 312 steps Wednesday and 7,517 Thursday. I’m definitely making strides toward that 10,000 mark! I can pretty much guarantee that I’ll hit 10k tomorrow because I am walking a 5k in the morning! I haven’t said much about it because, honestly, I’m not really prepared for it. It still hasn’t sunk in that I’m really doing one again. My sister-in-law asked me if I wanted to do it with her (she’s actually doing the 10k) and my nephew, and possibly my brother. Obviously I said yes but my mind just isn’t completely there this time. I’m actually kinda nervous about it right now. I know I can do it, that’s not the issue. I just haven’t prepared for it by walking like I should, plus my legs are KILLING me from my workout with Bobby yesterday. He did actually prepare me for it a little bit without even knowing it. We went to the gym (Core 24) to workout yesterday and he had me “warm-up” and “cool down” on the treadmill. He had my speed at like 2.6-2.7 with an incline of 2.5-3.0! My body is not used to that…my LEGS are not used to that! And on top of that, he had me doing leg extensions with 30lbs. My thighs are screaming at me today!! I just hope they feel better tomorrow for this race. Carlos actually said he wanted to see me run the next one! Yeah, we’ll see about that! LOL

Speaking of Carlos, I worked out with him Thursday before our Inspired! meeting and Zumba. And of course he made me run again. We didn’t have a whole lot of time to work out. I went straight there after work, changed clothes and we got going around 4:15pm; our meeting started at 4:45pm. We did about 4 rounds of running, kettlebell squats/raises, and modified burpees. The running actually aggravated my hip from where I “hurt” it Tuesday, but I did it and it didn’t kill me! I did feel like I was falling apart by the end of the night though. I have developed a bone spur on the top of my foot and that started hurting, plus my hip was already bothering me, then I started getting calf cramps during Zumba! Again, I still made it. There’s a quote image that I found a while back that rings true in situations just like this…

Friday I didn’t have a workout because I had a surprise birthday party for my 2nd mama (my best friend’s mom). I did well at her party though as far as Paleo goes. I had some chicken salad (no sandwich), some veggies, and fruit. I stayed away from the cake, even though I had to cut it. I didn’t even lick my fingers! We had a great time.

Today was homecoming at our church. I wasn’t really looking forward to it because of all the food I couldn’t eat. I wanted to dig in so bad, but I didn’t. I actually brought my own stuff to make a salad for my lunch. I did enjoy a little bit of the apple and cherry crisp that my mom made, but mainly ate the fruit filling and not so much of the topping. I couldn’t even eat much of it because it started becoming too much.

I’m proud of myself and the obstacles I overcame this weekend. That was actually the main topic of our Inspired! meeting this week, obstacles. We talked about different things that stand in our way of staying on target for our goals. This weekend it was special occasions for me. The biggest thing is being prepared. Carlos mentioned planning out your meals on Sundays. Honestly, if you don’t prepare, you set yourself up for failure. That doesn’t mean you can’t overcome, but the odds are stacked against you to make bad decisions. I knew there would be fruits and veggies at the party Friday, so I wasn’t worried. Today, I knew there wouldn’t be anything I could eat, so I took my own. "By failing to prepare you are preparing to fail." (Ben Franklin)

Today is the day you can take control of your life. Take the necessary steps to get where you want to be. You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.

Another Reason

Just another reason why I blog and share my journey with others. I got a message today from someone I went to high school with. We weren't the best of friends, which made this message that much more special.

Hey girl! Just wanted to tell you that you're looking GREAT!! You're a real motivation for me - even though I haven't done Zumba yet, getting healthy has become important again and I owe alot of it to you for sharing your Journey! I'm sure it's been a tough road, but it's paying off for you! Way to go, Alisha!! And thank you for sharing with us!!

Keep 'em coming, people! I am feeding from this!

It's All Paying Off

So it’s back to the grindstone after a not-so-productive weekend with workouts and eating. I did my regular Zumba class Monday night but had to cut out 30 minutes early for a Thirty-One meeting. I contacted the trainers yesterday to see when we could train again. I heard back from all of them then Laurie sent me a text with my schedule for the week! Last night she either wanted me to come train with her or go to step class. Since I haven’t had the chance to really work with her personally, I decided to do that. She pushed me harder than I actually expected. My arms we so sore; I could barely lift them to do the cool down exercise or afterward. It was great though. All of the trainers have been great to push me beyond my limits and give me the encouragement I need to keep going. I just wish I could afford these session after this is all over. But in the meantime, I am going to soak it all up and take full advantage of everything they have to offer!

As for the rest of this week, tonight I have Zumba again and another personal training session with Laurie. Tomorrow we have our Inspired! meeting and I’m doing another Zumba class. Can you tell I love Zumba?! Then I have a training session with Bobby Friday afternoon and with Carlos Saturday morning at 7:45am! WOW! Plus they want me to get in 10,000 steps, which is very hard. I have yet to get there actually. I did make it to over 6,100 yesterday. Laurie wants me to add 500 to that. So my goal for today is 6,600 steps! I think I can do it though, especially with Zumba tonight.

At our Inspired! meetings, everyone usually weighs every week except for me. They don’t want me to weigh again until the transformation is over. Laurie did mention that she wanted me to measure again though. With going out of town last weekend I didn’t get a chance to until last night. I usually measure only once every 4 weeks. I wasn’t sure what to expect, especially with my most recent less than mediocre losses. Plus this was cutting my time in half. But, like I said, I did measure last night. In just 2 weeks and 2 days (I last measured 8/5) I have lost 6 INCHES!! I was so shocked and surprised! I honestly couldn’t believe it. That is more than I have ever lost in a month, or even 6 weeks!!! OH MY HEAVENS! I can’t wait to see what my final measurements and weight it once this is all over! By the time the transformation end I will be at my one year mark for my weight-loss journey. So amazing! I am blessed.

Days 7 & 8 - Overwhelmed

Workouts have been great. I am still sore from Carlos’ workout on Monday. I think I was more uncomfortable Tuesday than Monday after the double workout! Normally I would just sit around and rest after being worked like that…but I didn’t. I did a 24 minute Biggest Loser Box-Fit workout on the Wii. Then yesterday I had my normal Zumba class and tonight I’m doing another Zumba class! I never could understand the people that worked out all the time, 6-7 days/week; but right now, I’m one of those people. To my surprise, I’m not as exhausted as I thought I would be right now. I’m still at the beginning of this transformation process, but that really gives me hope….which I really need right now.

I am completely blessed that I have this opportunity. I knew it would be hard, but it never crossed my mind about the emotional aspects of this specific journey. It’s not the workouts, it’s the eating right. You get so used to eating a certain way, or not even caring about what you eat…then to completely change everything. I don’t even know where to begin! I don’t know what to buy. I don’t know how to prepare it. I don’t know if I’ll like it. I went to the grocery store last night and basically just wondered around. I bought a bell pepper. Woo hoo. I wasn’t really sure what to look for or what I should/shouldn’t be buying. It’s hard to change 29 years’ worth of thinking and habits. I am absolutely clueless to this new way of things. I literally wanted to cry in the middle of the store, and almost did. I don’t know what I’m doing. Not to mention, to get started on the right path and get what I really need is expensive. Money we don’t have. I’m just overwhelmed……..

Day 1

I have quite a few people that have requested that I keep them update with my progress and the transformation journey. Well today was day one. It felt like just another day, but at the same time it didn’t. It was almost like today was the first day of the rest of my life. In essence it kind of was. I’ve been on a plateau for the past two months, edging toward the cliff, ready to fall off. Today, I backed away from that cliff. It felt really good. It felt good to know that I have a purpose again; that I have a goal to reach for. I had the motivation to stay away from the snacks and empty calories. I ate fairly well today, except for my one snickerdoodle cookie. I felt in control again. It’s hard to not feel in control and the toll it can take on your habits and emotions.


Zumba was amazing! I felt like everyone was watching me though, which was awkward. But at the same time, it made me work that much harder and to keep pushing. I got a couple of extra looks, pushes, and encouragement from Laurie during class. Then afterward I stuck around to talk with her about our plan and my eating for the day. She showed me a few arm workouts to do at home with some light weights. I’m gonna start working on that and getting a pedometer to count my steps.

I would be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous about what’s to come. I am; but at the same time I’m excited. I know I’m going to be pushed beyond my limits. I know I’m going to be sore and tired. I know it is going to take a real sacrifice to make this work. But I can honestly say I’m ready. I am ready for what’s to come and the new goals I’m going to reach throughout this month and the months to come. Let’s do this!!

Where has it gone?

My recent milestone of 35 inches lost has really gotten me thinking. I think about the fact that I've made so much progress and haven't given up. I've thought about it many times, but never gave in. That's a success in itself as well! I think about the different things that I can do now because of my progress. I think about how BIG of a number 35 really is and wonder -- where WERE all those inches?!? Let me just explain my inches lost to you. Over the past 7 months, I have lost 3.75in from my arms, 9in from my thighs, 4in from my shoulders, 10.25in from my waist, and 8in from my hips. HOLY COW!! Okay, with all that said, where did I put it all?! Where has it gone?! How much weight does that equal?! It's crazy to think about it all. I sometimes wonder if it's real. Like, have I really lost all those inches? I haven't HAD to buy new clothes yet. Some of my clothes are falling off me, but some of them still fit. Am I imagining it all? I know I'm not because I can feel the difference. It's just all so overwhelming to think about sometimes. All this has been running through my head over the past 2 weeks since I last measured. I am just so excited and ready to take it on! I can't even begin to tell you the difference in my life this journey has made. I am so blessed in many ways. I can't wait to see what the next 7 months have in store!

Blessed

In the midst of trials, it's remarkable how God works and reminds you that you are STILL blessed and highly favored. Some times you hear it directly from Him, or you hear it through a friend's encouraging word, or through a song. I've had it ALL this week. Leah reminded me of His faithfulness in a text and today I was listening to my iPod and I heard a song that I haven't heard in a long time by the Crabb Family. The first and last line (song title) of the chorus just stuck out to me: "In the midst of the storm, He spoke 'Peace be still' and the winds lay at His feet. / When you've done all you can, remember Jesus can do all that you can't." Then I hear God's voice whisper - "I can do it!" It doesn't matter how deep or dark the valley seems to be, God still has control. He won't give you more than you can bear WITHOUT a way of escape! It doesn't matter how many times I fail him, His love is limitless and unconditional. His grace and mercy are unwavering. He never ceases to amaze me!

I am also blessed by the people and opportunities God has placed in my life. It's not coincidence, it's divine intervention! God knew years ago what I would need today. He knew the journey I would be on and the support "staff" that I would need. He took certain situations and made friendships. He put people in my path that I might not have chosen for myself. Had it not been for people I met 10+ years ago, I would not have the push and foundation I need for the journey I am on today. I am thankful for where I am today. I'm nowhere near where I want to be, but I know I'll get there. God has me in the palm of His hand and will continue provide where I need him to; I have no doubt in that whatsoever!

Progress

As I was on my way home from Zumba tonight, I really started thinking about my journey over the past 6 months. First off, I can't believe it's actually been that long -- it has been amazing! I see a change and difference in myself that I never really thought I would ever see or feel. I have started countless diets and exercised, but I always quit. Habits are hard to make and break, and up until now I didn't think it was possible to change them....but I HAVE! I am no where near where I want to be and some habits are still hard to break...but I'm working on it. This is more than just diet and exercise -- this is my LIFE now. Healthy foods are in the forefront of my mind and exercise is like second nature to me now. I can't even tell you how bad I feel when I miss a workout/Zumba. As much as it "hurts" to exercise sometimes, it hurts worse knowing that if my life doesn't change I won't be ABLE to exercise.

Like I said, I am no where near where I want to be in my life (all aspects), but I can most certainly see the progress. I can actually see where I've lost the inches. I can feel a difference in my body. I can feel my stamina building. When I first started doing Zumba, I'll admit - I was scared. I knew my overweight self wouldn't be able to keep up with all the "little" bodies in class...but I did it anyway. I kept going and kept going...and NOW, I can double time with [most] the best of them! When I started walking, I got winded and needed to stop just walking a mile. NOW, I can do two miles without needing a "break." Heck, I even completed a 5k...and plan on doing another one soon! I'm not the best dancer or the fastest walker, but I'm proud of what I can do now. I can honestly say that I am excited to go back to the cardiologist and tell him what all has happened in the past 6 months! :) I am blessed beyond measure, and am excited to see what I'll do next...

Amazing

Man, let me just tell you -- my body has been throwing me some curve balls here lately. I cannot even begin to tell you how badly my neck and shoulders are bothering me. I'm pretty sure it's probably just stress from work, but they are so tight it's crazy! It has been so bad that I literally cannot stand it. I have not slept well for about the past week. I have been dreaming about people that I haven't seen in forever! Not usually a bad thing, but it has consumed my sleep so much that it has not been restful. Last night, I finally could not take it anymore so I took some meds and had my mom put some Bengay on my neck and shoulders. That was the first night that I have slept anywhere near peacefully. I don't think I moved until about 6am this morning.

Now, you wanna hear something crazy? ....I have also felt the most AMAZING this week! I know -- how bizarre, right?! I went to Zumba Monday and last night and I felt like those were the BEST workouts I have had in -- well, ever! I felt incredible leaving Inspire 4 Life Fitness this week. I don't know what it is...I have been going for almost 2 months now and I've felt the burn and worked my heart out...I just can't explain it. It's mind-boggling the difference Zumba and exercise have made in my life. There is so much more substance in my life and I have so much more to look forward to.

I know I do this all the time, but I really have to thank the people that have a part in my journey! Each one of you that post comments here on my blog or Facebook -- you will never know how much your encouragement and support truly mean to me. I thrive on it! My accountability partners - Leah and Jessica - have been incredible. Now, I can add Laurie to my list of important people. She is my Zumba instructor and she is wonderful! Thank you, Laurie, for your dedication to wellness and supporting people like me that aren't in the best of shape! You have made a real impact on me.

For those of you that say -- I don't feel like working out....JUST DO IT!! I feel worse when I don't work out than when I do. I basically just explained that to you! There is so much more to it than just "working out" or "exercising." There is such a feeling of accomplishment that comes out of walking for 20 minutes or going to a Zumba class. You don't have to be the best, but you'll never be anything if you don't at least TRY!

Extra Push

It is no secret that the past few weeks have not been great for me. They have been a huge roller coaster ride, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. My life is a journey and my journey to weight-loss and health is a daily struggle. I've been this way all my life, it's hard to change habits. It's hard to change the way you think about food, how you eat, and your level of activity after doing it the same way for almost 29 years. It is tough and that's why I have brought you along on this journey. I want to share my ups and downs with you. This is hard to say/do, and not meaning this in a self-centered way - but I want everyone to see my struggles and the fight it takes to get it right. There is someone out there that needs to know that someone else is on the same journey or has been exactly where they are -- whether they read this today or 5 years down the road. Someone out there needs to know that it's okay to fail but you are not a failure unless you give up!

Along with the struggles, I want to share my victories! As I have blogged before, I completed a 5k on January 21st. I mentioned that day that I had lost a total of 24 inches since 9/11/12. Well, as of last night, that number is up to 28.75! In the midst of a challenging month, I have lost another 4.75 inches! This is the exact reason that it is essential to keep pushing. And when you don't think you have anything left in you, KEEP PUSHING! Trust me -- you'll be surprised -- the strength will come! One little victory will give you the reinforcement that you need to keep going. There's a country song by Rodney Atkins: If you're going through hell, keep on moving. Face that fire. Walk right through it. You might get out before the devil even knows you're there. It might seem like hell in the battles and struggles that you face, but before you know it you'll be on the other side wondering how in the world you made it through! Take one step at a time. It's a process -- physically and mentally -- but eventually we'll make it!

I Am Who I Am

My honest statement: My weight/health is what it is because I ate what I ate and didn't do what I should have done. I'm changing that now. I have been on this journey whole-heartedly since September 11, 2011. I kinda started before that, but that date is when I consciously made the decision to attack this thing full-force. That is the day I first measured....my starting point. One thing that I keep in my head is that "The only thing standing in the way of me is ME!"

This is a personal journey that only I can take. No one can do it for me. I have to be the one to change. I have to be the one to eat different. I have to be the one to get out and walk. I have to be the one to do the exercises. But even though this is a personal journey, it is SO beneficial to have someone walking with me....literally and figuratively. So I cannot even begin to tell you how much it means to have an accountability partner! If you're on a similar journey, I encourage you to get one if you don't already. I'll be glad to stand by you if you can't find one. It has made such a difference in my decisions and confidence. If it were not for Jessica and Leah, my 2 main partners, I can pretty much guarantee that I would have given up a long time ago!

This journey is HARD, it gets discouraging, I have failed -- but with people by my side, it's easier to get back up and keep going. They push me, support me, criticize me, encourage me....I am blessed to have them on this journey with me. I'm sure you're saying to yourself, "Criticize you??" YES, the provide me with criticisms that I wouldn't accept from anyone else.  One of my favorite quotes right now is this: Cherish the friend who tells you a harsh truth, wanting ten times more to tell you a loving lie. *Robert Brault* I am lucky to have them be truthful to me. Yes, it's hard sometimes, but I know they love me. I know this because they tell me the truth and don't beat around the bush with me or try to sugar-coat things. It's scary, but I know they're behind me 100% -- success or fail...and they push me so I don't fail!

It feels so good to finally get back on track with paying more attention to what I am eating and putting in my body and exercising. I'll admit, the past few weeks have not been great. But I can tell you why -- I didn't have any goals. I hadn't sat down, talked it out, and committedly decided what I would be working on. I have some set goals now though. They are:

1. Eat out only 3 times/week.
2. Eat less than 3 snacks/day.
3. Exercise 4 times/week.
4. Blog 4 times/week.
5. Drink more water!

It is so important to have goals. And it takes a plan to achieve your goals. I encourage you to take some time, sit down, and map out your goals. It doesn't have to necessarily be for weight-loss, it could be for your career or just life in general. Just DO IT!!!!

FOCUS

I've been sitting here with my blog up ready to post, but am just not sure how to put into words what I'm feeling/thinking. I haven't felt that great today. I haven't logged my calories for a couple of days, so I feel guilty about that. I didn't go walk today or do any other workout, so I'm bummed about that. The more I think about it, the more I realize that the days I don't workout are the days I feel the worst!

"Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy."

*Legally Blonde*

I've come to the realization that working out keeps my mind on track. I feel like I'm actually doing something to change my life -- more accomplished. I've got to quit making excuses and letting things stop me from getting out there and doing what I'm supposed to do! I've got to do what makes me happy....and that's not food anymore! If I slack off on exercising, that's exactly where my mind goes. I'm starting to lose control and I cannot let that happen! So what I'm asking of you is this -- ASK me if I've worked out today. KEEP me accountable. Yes, I'm doing this for myself, but sometimes I just need that extra PUSH!

I did a devotion at a women's retreat a couple of years ago and my title was this: FOCUS. Faith Overcomes Circumstances and Undermines Satan! I have to stay focused. I cannot go back to my old way of living, eating, doing things. I have to keep moving forward no matter what tries to get in my way. I have to turn stumbling blocks into stepping stones. I have to keep going. I cannot let the best be behind me -- MY BEST is yet to come!

Failing is not Failure

I saw this quote on Pinterest tonight "Failing is not failure." I needed to see this today. I've felt like a failure in my eating the past week. But you know, I can't let it define my journey! I'm not going to let it! I am who I choose to be -- and that is NOT a failure!

While I can see myself making better choices for myself, I can see that I'm starting to drift back to my old ways of eating. So many times before, this is where I would just give up. I would let myself keep drifting until I didn't care/worry about what I was eating anymore. .....but THIS TIME I am deciding that my health is worth the struggle!

This is a battle that I'm going to be facing for the rest of my life. This is not just a fad diet. This is getting healthy. This is not having to lay dying on a hospital bed because they can't do anything for me due to my weight. This is pushing forward to obtain the goals I've always dreamed of for myself. I can see where I'm going wrong -- now it's up to me to change and get back on the right path. 

I don't care how much power, brilliance, or energy you have, if you don't harness it and focus it on a specific target, and hold it there, you're never going to accomplish as much as your ability warrants

*Zig Ziglar*

Don't let the fear of the time it will take to accomplish something to stand in the way of your doing it. The time will pass anyway; we might just as well put that passing time to the best possible use.

*Earl Nightingale*

Desire is the key to motivation, but it is determination and commitment to an unrelenting pursuit of your goal - a commitment to excellence - that will enable you to attain the success you seek.

*Mario Andretti*

Past Inspiration

I was looking through some of my older posts tonight and found some quotes from a Mary Kay retreat I attended over 2 years ago that can completely go along with my weight-loss journey.

*Your mind knows no differently that what you feed it.*

*Once you have a decided heart, you can achieve anything!*

*Indecision limits the Almighty.*

*God has given you a 2nd chance, are you going to take it??*

It's hard sometimes to keep my mind focused on what I need to be eating versus what I want to be eating. If I continue to feed my mind and body what I want, I'll stay the way I am. I just have to remember my ultimate goal and keep going full force....because the 2nd quote is completely true! You can achieve anything if you make up your mind to do it. Yeah, I'll make mistakes and fall down, but will I stay down? NO! That means I'm indecisive and not really committed. How can we expect God to work in our lives if we can't make up our minds on what we want, or what we're willing to do?!? Sometimes we have to work for our blessings and God can't bless us if we're not working toward our goals. With that being said, are YOU going to take your 2nd chance and RUN with it?! No one will fight for your dreams/goals like you will!

*Hard work! Dedication! No excuses!*

My [New] Story

I can't even begin to tell you my WHOLE story, so let me just give you a few details and start from the past year. I have been fat all my life....from elementary school all through my adult life. I would think from time to time that I need to lose weight and would start to diet. But within weeks I was back to my old habits and going about my life. I hate to say it, but I was "content" with being fat....that's how I'd always been and I'd come to the realization that I was always going to be that way. WRONG!!! Last year, I went to the doctor for a regular check-up and my blood pressure was SKY HIGH. I knew in the back of my mind that it could always be a possibility because my mom has it but when the doctor told me what the reading was, I completely broke down. She referred me to a cardiologist to have it checked out....that was just as scary! Well, I went to the cardiologist and he did a complete blood panel and an EKG. Everything was fine with my heart and cholesterol. I just had the high blood pressure. I thank God that it wasn't worse -- at my weight, I'm surprised (and blessed!) I don't have a million other things wrong with me! Anyway, my cardiologist bluntly told me that if things didn't change, I would die very early. MAN what a wake-up call! I knew my life had to change....my eating habits, my activity level, my thoughts about food -- ALL of it!!

I was at Thirty-One Conference with some friends that I went to college with [we all reunited over 31!] back in July. I had never really shared my story with anyone or what the doctors were telling me....but at conference, one of the girls I was with - Jessica - and I had a "gettin nekid" conversation about it ALL!! I poured it all out to her and she shared some concerns and thoughts that she had about me during college and even now. Needless to say, we are now closer than ever! She has helped me to get going -- and stay on -- my journey to health and fitness. She is my accountability partner and helps me to set my short-term and long-term goals. Honestly, without Jessica, I would have probably given up a long time ago!!

I started my journey FULL FORCE on 9/11/2011 and so far have lost a total of 20.5 inches and my blood pressure is considerable lower! I still have a long ways to go and this is more than just a "diet". This is a complete lifestyle change and I want to include you all on this journey. I want to blog about my thoughts, foods, activities, and goals. My ultimate goal in doing this is to continue to keep myself accountable and to hopefully inspire others that IF I CAN DO THIS, SO CAN YOU!!!